How long should an obituary for a parent be?

Most run between 200 and 500 words. It isn't an essay you have to be brilliant at — it's a short, structured announcement with some heart in the middle. If you're publishing in print, length also costs money, so ask first.

Do I have to say the cause of death?

No. It's optional. Some families include a gentle phrase in the opening line — passed away peacefully, after a long illness, surrounded by family — and many leave it out entirely. Both are completely normal and nobody reading it will think twice. Say only what your family is comfortable having in print.

Who do I list under survived by, and in what order?

Start with the spouse, then children and their spouses, then grandchildren, then siblings and other close loved ones. Use a consistent format — name, then relationship, and for in-laws something like 'and his wife, Karen.' If the list is long, group by count: 'seven grandchildren and three great-grandchildren.' Then list those who died before them under preceded in death by. Double-check every spelling with a relative. Getting a name wrong is the one mistake families remember.

Where do I publish it, and does it cost money?

Newspapers usually charge by the line or the word, so ask the price before you write to length. Online obituary pages — Legacy.com, the funeral home's own site, or Facebook — are typically free and have no length limit, which is why most families post there and keep the print version short.

The funeral home needs it tomorrow. Where do I start?

Gather the facts before you write a single sentence: full legal names, dates of birth, death and marriage, cities, and the names of surviving family. Then write the announcement line, because it's the easiest one — full name, age, city, date. From there fill in the template on this page block by block. Four to six sentences about their life is genuinely enough. Read it out loud, have one other family member proofread it, and send it. A simple, honest obituary written today is better than a perfect one that misses the service.

How to Write an Obituary for a Parent (Free Template)

First, I’m sorry. If you’re reading this, you’ve probably just lost your mom or dad, and someone — maybe the funeral home, maybe yourself — needs an obituary, fast, often within a day or two. That’s a brutal thing to ask of someone who is grieving. The good news: an obituary is not an essay you have to be brilliant at. It’s a short, structured announcement with a little bit of heart in the middle. You can do this, and this page will walk you through every piece, give you a fill-in-the-blank template you can copy, and show you two complete examples.

Take it slow. You don’t have to capture your parent’s entire life. You just have to write something true and warm.

What an obituary actually needs to do

An obituary does three jobs at once:

Announces the death (so people know).
Honors the person (a short tribute to who they were).
Shares the practical details (service times, where to send flowers or donations).

Most obituaries are between 200 and 500 words. Newspapers often charge by the line or word, so if you’re publishing in print, ask the cost first — online obituary pages (Legacy.com, the funeral home’s site, Facebook) are usually free and unlimited.

The 8 building blocks (in order)

Here’s the standard structure. Work through them one at a time and you’ll have a complete draft.

Announcement line — full name, age, city, and date of death. Optionally a gentle phrase (“passed away peacefully,” “after a long illness,” “surrounded by family”).
Born line — date and place of birth, and parents’ names.
Life summary — the through-line of their life: career, military service, where they lived, what they loved. This is the heart.
Personality & passions — 2–4 sentences on who they were. Hobbies, faith, humor, the thing everyone knew them for.
Family — survived by — spouse, children, grandchildren, siblings still living.
Family — preceded in death by — those who passed before them.
Service details — visitation, funeral/memorial, burial, dates, times, locations.
Closing line — donations “in lieu of flowers,” a favorite quote, or a short farewell.

Work top to bottom and you can't leave anything out — spend your writing energy on blocks 3 and 4.

Step-by-step: how to write it

Step 1 — Gather the facts before you write a word. Dates (birth, death, marriage), full legal names, cities, and the names of family members. Getting names wrong is the one mistake people never forgive, so double-check spellings with relatives.

Step 2 — Write the announcement line first. It’s the easiest. “Margaret Anne Foster, 78, of Asheville, North Carolina, passed away peacefully on June 12, 2026.”

Step 3 — Tell their story in 4–6 sentences. Don’t list everything. Pick the spine of their life and a few details only the family would know. “She made the best pie at every church potluck” beats “She enjoyed cooking.”

Step 4 — List family carefully. Use a consistent format: name (relationship), and for in-laws/spouses, “and his wife, Karen.” Group grandchildren and great-grandchildren by count if the list is long (“seven grandchildren and three great-grandchildren”).

Step 5 — Add the service details exactly as the funeral home gave them. Times, dates, addresses. People will plan travel around this — get it right.

Step 6 — Close with something that sounds like them. A line of scripture, a lyric, a saying they always used, or simply “She will be deeply missed by all who knew her.”

Step 7 — Read it out loud, then have one other family member proofread. Out loud catches the awkward bits. A second reader catches the wrong middle name.

Free obituary template (copy and fill in)

[Full Name], [age], of [City, State], [passed away / died peacefully / went home to be with the Lord] on [date of death], [optional cause/circumstance].

[He/She] was born on [date] in [city], to [parents’ names].

[2–6 sentences: career, marriage, military service, where they lived, their faith, the things they loved. Include one specific, personal detail.]

[Name] is survived by [spouse], [children and their spouses], [grandchildren], [siblings], and [other loved ones].

[He/She] was preceded in death by [names and relationships].

A [visitation / funeral service / celebration of life] will be held on [date] at [time] at [location/address]. [Burial / interment details if applicable.]

In lieu of flowers, the family asks that donations be made to [charity/cause]. [Optional closing quote or farewell line.]

That’s the whole skeleton. Swap in your details and you have a publishable obituary.

Example 1 — Obituary for a mother

Margaret Anne Foster, 78, of Asheville, North Carolina, passed away peacefully on June 12, 2026, surrounded by her family.

Margaret was born on March 4, 1948, in Knoxville, Tennessee, to James and Eleanor Whitfield. She married the love of her life, Robert Foster, in 1969, and together they raised three children and built a home full of music, books, and Sunday pie.

A retired second-grade teacher of 31 years, Margaret believed every child deserved patience. She sang alto in the First Baptist choir, kept a garden the neighbors envied, and never once let a guest leave hungry.

She is survived by her husband, Robert; her children, David Foster (and wife Karen), Susan Mills (and husband Tom), and Michael Foster; seven grandchildren; and her sister, Helen. She was preceded in death by her parents and her brother, Frank.

A celebration of her life will be held Saturday, June 21, at 11:00 a.m. at First Baptist Church, Asheville. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the local literacy council. “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

Example 2 — Obituary for a father

Robert “Bob” James Carter, 81, of Toledo, Ohio, died on June 9, 2026, after a courageous battle with cancer.

Bob was born on August 17, 1944, in Detroit, Michigan, to Walter and Rose Carter. A proud U.S. Army veteran, he served two tours before returning home to a 40-year career as a union electrician. He married Linda Hayes in 1971.

Bob could fix anything, told the same fishing stories with total joy every time, and coached Little League for two decades. He was happiest in a boat at dawn with a thermos of coffee and one of his grandkids beside him.

He is survived by his wife, Linda; his sons, James and Daniel Carter; four grandchildren; and his brother, Richard. He was preceded in death by his parents and his daughter, Mary.

Visitation will be held Friday, June 20, from 4–7 p.m. at Sullivan Funeral Home, with a service Saturday at 10:00 a.m. Donations may be made to the Wounded Warrior Project in his memory.

Common mistakes to avoid

Misspelled names or wrong dates. The #1 regret. Verify everything twice.
Trying to include every detail. Pick the meaningful few. Length isn’t love.
Forgetting the practical info. People need the when and where to show up.
Waiting until you feel “ready.” You may never feel ready. A simple, honest obituary written today is better than a perfect one that misses the service.

The fastest free option, and the upgrade

The free path is right here: take the template above, fill in your eight blocks, read it aloud, and have someone proofread it. That alone will get you a respectful, complete obituary — no purchase required.

If you’re also carrying the speech, how to write a eulogy for a mother and for a father walk through it the same way — and when the notes start arriving, what to write in a funeral thank-you card is here for that week too.